by Orlando C. Fernando
June 18, 1998
What if restaurants were run by... UNIX Programmers: Menus would be indecipherable but the food tastes REALLY good! FOX TV Producers: One food item would poison customers so Mulder can investigate. Microsoft: The food isn't bad, but somehow you always crave more and more. America-On-Line: All you can eat. No shirts or shoes required. Soliticing encouraged. David Duke: No chocolate milk shakes. Coffee always with cream and brown sugar. Lorne Michaels: Every Saturday night, the food gets worse and worse. The Mafia: Bar sections with extra supplies of ice. Puff Daddy: Food's all good. Uh-huh. Uh-uh. You can't stop. Yeah. That's right. Professional Wrestlers: Lots of threatening waiters to eat your food 'cause that's the bottom line. Endless supply of Slim Jim's. Howard Stern: Plenty of booster seats for small children. Darth Vader: Food eaten through respirators. Jukeboxes dying but fully operational. Father's Day Specials. Martin Luther King Jr.: The lettuce is free, free at last. THE mashed potatoes and THE gravy can come together as one.
Copyright 1998 by Orlando C. Fernando. This page is for personaluse only and not for reselling nor distribution to people outside his intended audience.