by Orlando C. Fernando
January 27, 1999
Some winter humor (a few true sometimes) to keep us warm and toasty in Upstate New York and the entire northern territories of the US.
How do
you catch snowflakes on your tongue?
Put your
head under the kitchen faucet.
What's
the difference between the Northeast and Midwest?
How far
up your body you experience frostbite.
What's
the best way to wipe massive snow off your car?
Stop the
car first.
How do
you best get a one-way trip?
Drive to
Buffalo.
What famous
three ice sculptures are in downtown Rochester?
The park
attendant, the traffic cop, and the meter maid.
What is
the best winter shielding for your car?
A snowplow.
90's (32 C) - man! I forgot an air conditioner! Where's the lake?
80's (27 C) - pure heaven, July 4th is here!
70's (21 C) - pure heaven. T-shirt and bikini weather
60's (16 C) - how DARE it drop to this one summer night!
50's (10 C) - you're still not convinced the summer's ended. still shorts weather.
40's (4 C) - you laugh at people that say it's cold. Long vest & shorts weather!
30's (-1 C) - you realize smoke from your mouth is not from a cigarette
20's (-7 C) - you find your idle car in the morning quite cozy
10's (-12 C) - If you curl good enough, you won't shiver starting the car
0 (-18 C) - you swear your chapped lips are just shedding for the season
-10's (-23 C) - you appreciate how warm the 30's were
-20's (-29 C) - you realize the 20's were like the 30's from your car to a building
-30's (-34 C) - it's not the -40's! And it will reach 0 by tomorrow!!!
Copyright 2001 by Orlando C. Fernando.
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